you explain by saying that you win money gambling. Im not sure the IRS finds that believable.Im a great gambler, and I can prove it,says Ralph`How about me giving you ademonstration? The auditor thinks for a moment and said, Okay. Go ahead. Ralph says, I'll bet you a thousand dollars that I can bite my own eye.The auditor thinks a moment and says, Its a bet.Ralph removes his glass eye and bites it. The auditors jaw drops. Ralph says, Now, I'll bet you two thousand dollars that I can bite my other eye. Now the auditor can see that Ralph isnt blind, so he takes the bet. Ralph removes his dentures and bites his good eye. The stunned auditor now realizes he has wagered and lost three thousand dollars, with Ralphs attorney as a witness. He starts to get nervous. Want to go double or nothing? Ralph asks I'll bet you six thousand dollars that I can stand on one side of your desk, and pee into that wastebasket on the other side, and never get a drop anywhere in between.The auditor, twice burned, is cautious now, but he looks carefully and decides theres no way this guy could possibly manage that stunt, so he agrees again. Ralph stands beside the desk and unzips his pants, but although he strains mightily, he cant make the stream reach the wastebasket on the other side, so he pretty much urinates all over the auditors desk. The auditor leaps with joy, realizing that he has just turned a major loss into a huge win. But Ralphs attorney moans and puts his head in his hands.Are you okay? the auditor asks. Not really,says the attorney. This morning, when Ralph told me hed been summoned for an audit, he bet me twenty-five thousand dollars that he could come in here and urinate all over your desk and that you'd be happy about it.
No comments:
Post a Comment