Liveing Will

 Living Will Form I, __________________________, being of sound mind and body, do not wish to be kept aliveby artificial means.Under no circumstances should my fate be put in the hands of pinhead politicians who couldn't pass ninth-grade biology if their lives depended on it. Nor in the hands of lawyers/doctors who are interested simply in running up the bills.If a reasonable amount of time passes and I fail to ask for at least one of the following:Bloody Mary, White Russian, Screwdriver,Manhattan, Vodka and Tonic, lobster or crab legs, the remote control, bowl of ice cream, the sports page..chocolate, ..it should be presumed that I won't ever get better.When such a determination is reached, I hereby instruct my appointed person and attending physicians to pull the plug, reel in the tubes and call it a day.At this point, it is time to call good Jazz Funeral Band to come do their thing at my funeral, and ask all of my friends to raise their glasses to toast thgood times we have had.Signature: ___________________________Date: ___________________________

50 Year old woman

 A 50-something year old white woman arrived at her seat on a crowded flight and immediately didn't want the seat. The seat was next to a black man. Disgusted, the woman immediately summoned the flight attendant and demanded a new seat. The woman said "I cannot sit here next to this black man." The flight attendant said "Let me see if I can find another seat." After checking, the flight attendant returned and stated "Ma'am, there are no more seats in economy, but I will check with the captain and see if there is something in first class." About 10 minutes went by and the flight attendant returned and stated "The captain has confirmed that there are no more seats in economy, but there is one in first class. It is our company policy to never move a person from economy to first class, but being that it would be some sort of scandal to force a person to sit next to an UNPLEASANT person, the captain agreed to make the switch to first class." Before the woman could say anything, the attendant gestured to the black man and said, "Therefore sir, if you would so kindly retrieve your personal items, we would like to move you to the comfort of first class as the captain doesn't want you to sit next to an unpleasant person." Passengers in the seats nearby began to applause while some gave a standing ovation. If you are against racism,show it in your daily lives.

Walking The Walk

 "Each individual of the society has a right to be protected by it in the enjoyment of his life, liberty, and property, according to standing laws. He is obliged, consequently, to contribute his share to the expense of this protection; and to give his personal service, or an equivalent, when necessary. But no part of the property of any individual can, with justice, be taken from him, or applied to public uses, without his own consent, or that of the representative body of the people. In fine, the people of this commonwealth are not controllable by any other laws than those to which their constitutional representative body have given their consent."John Adams 
   
 "I am for doing good to the poor, but I differ in opinion of the means. I think the best way of doing good to the poor, is not making them easy in poverty, but leading or driving them out of it. In my youth I traveled much, and I observed in different countries, that the more public provisions were made for the poor, the less they provided for themselves, and of course became poorer. And, on the contrary, the less was done for them, the more they did for themselves, and became richer." Do you agree or disagree with the following statement made by Benjamin Franklin?

Kentucky Hotel

Kentucky hotel----- How do you know when you're staying in a Kentucky hotel?When you call the front desk and say "I've got a leak in my sink," and the person at the front desk says, "Go ahead." 

A Nurse

A nurse took the tired, anxious serviceman to the bedside. "Your son is here," she said to the old man. She had to repeat the words several times before the patient's eyes opened.Heavily sedated because of the pain of his heart attack, he... dimly saw the young uniformed Marine standing outside the oxygen tent. He reached out his hand. The Marine wrapped his toughened fingers around the old man's limp ones, squeezing a message of love and encouragement.The nurse brought a chair so that the Marine could sit beside the bed. All through the night the young Marine sat there in the poorly lighted ward, holding the old man's hand and offering him words of love and strength. Occasionally, the nurse suggested that the Marine move away and rest awhile. He refused.Whenever the nurse came into the ward, the Marine was oblivious of her and of the night noises of the hospital - the clanking of the oxygen tank, the laughter of the night staff members exchanging greetings, the cries and moans of the other patients. Now and then she heard him say a few gentle words. The dying man said nothing, only held tightly to his son all through the night. Along towards dawn, the old man died. The Marine released the now lifeless hand he had been holding and went to tell the nurse. While she did what she had to do, he waited.
Finally, she returned. She started to offer words of sympathy, but the Marine interrupted her, "Who was that man?" he asked.The nurse was startled, "He was your father," she answered."No, he wasn't," the Marine replied. "I never saw him before in my life.""Then why didn't you say something when I took you to him?"
"I knew right away there had been a mistake, but I also knew he needed his son, and his son just wasn't here. When I realized that he was too sick to tell whether or not I was his son, knowing how much he needed me, I stayed. I came here tonight to find a Mr. William Grey. His Son was killed in Iraq today, and I was sent to inform him. What was this Gentleman's Name? " The nurse with tears in her eyes answered, "Mr. William Grey..."

The next time someone needs you . just be there.

A Three Year Old

THREE YEAR OLD BOY IS SITTING ON THE TOILET. HIS MOTHER THINKS HE HAS BEEN IN THERE TOO LONG, SO SHE GOES IN TO SEE WHAT'S UP. THE LITTLE BOY IS SITTING ON THE TOILET READING A BOOK. BUT ABOUT EVERY 15 SECONDS OR SO, HE PUTS THE BOOK DOWN, GRIPS ONTO THE TOILET SEAT WITH HIS LEFT HAND AND HITS HIMSELF ON TOP OF HIS HEAD WITH HIS RIGHT HAND.HIS MOTHER

SAYS: "BILLY, ARE YOU ALL RIGHT? YOU'VE BEEN IN HERE FOR A WHILE." BILLY SAYS: "I'M FINE, MOMMY. I JUST HAVEN'T GONE POTTY' YET." MOTHER SAYS: "OK, YOU CAN STAY HERE A FEW MORE MINUTES, BUT, BILLY, WHY ARE YOU HITTING YOURSELF ON THE HEAD?" BILLY SAYS: "WORKS FOR KETCHUP."

A Daughters Last Gift

A Daughter's Last Gift Turns Her Struggling Family Into New Millionaires
By Bryan Llenas Published May 17, 2013 Fox News Latino


Savannah Cerezo, 14, who died in August 2012. The glass cookie jar Savannah bought for her mother and where the $4.8 million lotto ticket was found.
The Cerezo family hasn't been facing the best of times.Their house has been in foreclosure since February and they were months away from eviction.Their cars were repossessed.Their jewelry gone, sold to the highest bidder.Ricardo Cerezo, the 44-year-old head of household, quit his job in management consulting in 2010 to take care of his daughter, Savannah, who had to stay home with severe bipolar disorder. A professional in helping companies in distress, he painstakingly took her to and from medical appointments and trips to the hospital. But 14-year-old Savannah died last August. Brain-dead, her parents pulled her off life support after suffering four-and-a-half hours of seizures.
One of Savannah's last gifts to her parents was a glass cookie jar. And one of her last requests, seeing their financial struggles, was urging them to never stop playing the lottery.  "Savannah was the only one that encouraged us to play," he told Fox News Latino.  "Everyone at home thought it was a waste of time given that we needed every penny."The father played when he could and saved old lottery tickets - they never won anything - in that glass cookie jar. This week, nine months after Savannah's death, Ricardo and his wife, Bonnie, were doing some kitchen cleaning and she asked him to finally do something about three months' worth of old tickets filling up the jar.Do something with them, she asked him. So instead of throwing them out, he decided to actually check if one of the tickets had winning numbers.Did it ever.Ricardo took the 11 tickets stashed in the cookie jar to the 7-Eleven where he had bought them. The first eight out of the nine tickets came up empty. The next ticket was a winner - $3. But the last ticket, a Quick Pix, alerted Cerezo that he needed to file a claim, which means the ticket was worth $600 or more.As it turns out, it was worth nearly $5 million. It'll be spread out in annual payments of $100,000 for 26 years and paid on each February, coincidentally Savannah's birthday month.Ricardo Cerezo had no doubt - it was all Savannah's divine doing."She kept insisting that somehow she was going to pay us back," he said. "She kept her promise."The turn of events has dramatically impacted the Cerezos.Now they'll be able to keep their home - they hadn't touched Savannah's room, except for adding an urn with her ashes.
It was in that very room where Ricardo cried for losing his daughter and where he prayed that life would get better for his family."Dear lord, please just don't take away this room," he said he prayed. "We had lost everything we had. The room was the last thing we had of her existence."Little did we know the answer was downstairs the whole time," Ricardo said, in a nondescript glass cookie jar filled with old papers.Beyond being able to pay the house off and return to a normal life at home, now the Cerezos won't have to worry about how to afford to pay for college for their two other children.They also pledged to contribute to their church -  where they sought consolation while grieving Savannah's death -and other charities. They will also look to fund organizations, or start an organization of their own, that will conduct research into mental health, given their daughter's deadly bout with bipolar disorder."Every now, and then we can find the joy in the win itself," Ricardo said. "We are very happy that we have some financial peace. But there is no real jumping for joy." But even with the unexpected economic turnaround at home, Ricardo Cerezo noted he's not about to forget what making it through hard work is all about.Come Monday, he'll report to work just like any other day.